The Ego Trip
Psychedelic Toads, A Trail of Deaths and The Guru Who Peddled Transcendence
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A psychedelic guru, a magical toad and the dark side of the modern quest for transcendence.
'Entirely mesmerising . . . The Ego Trip is itself a trip' PATRICK RADDEN KEEFE
'A one-of-a-kind book. I loved it' WILLIAM FINNEGAN
'Strange and wonderful' SUSAN ORLEAN
In 2012, physician Octavio Rettig claimed he had revived a forgotten indigenous ritual: smoking the secretions of the Sonoran Desert toad, which releases a potent psychedelic substance known as 'the God molecule'. The experience promised ego death, communion with the divine and extraordinary relief for those suffering from PTSD, depression and drug addiction. As word spread, Octavio became the face of a global psychedelic movement, drawing seekers from around the world.
Yet as his fame grew, so did troubling reports of extreme dosing, abusive behaviour and a disturbing cult-like following. what began as a spiritual revival evolved into something far more dangerous.
In this gripping and deeply reported book, Kimon de Greef explores the promise and the peril of 'toad medicine'. Part true crime, part cult story, part investigative journalism, The Ego Trip chronicles the rise and fall of a self-made messianic figure while probing our relentless search for cosmic understanding.
'Entirely mesmerising . . . The Ego Trip is itself a trip' PATRICK RADDEN KEEFE
'A one-of-a-kind book. I loved it' WILLIAM FINNEGAN
'Strange and wonderful' SUSAN ORLEAN
In 2012, physician Octavio Rettig claimed he had revived a forgotten indigenous ritual: smoking the secretions of the Sonoran Desert toad, which releases a potent psychedelic substance known as 'the God molecule'. The experience promised ego death, communion with the divine and extraordinary relief for those suffering from PTSD, depression and drug addiction. As word spread, Octavio became the face of a global psychedelic movement, drawing seekers from around the world.
Yet as his fame grew, so did troubling reports of extreme dosing, abusive behaviour and a disturbing cult-like following. what began as a spiritual revival evolved into something far more dangerous.
In this gripping and deeply reported book, Kimon de Greef explores the promise and the peril of 'toad medicine'. Part true crime, part cult story, part investigative journalism, The Ego Trip chronicles the rise and fall of a self-made messianic figure while probing our relentless search for cosmic understanding.
- Published: Aug 06 2026
- Pages: 336
- 236 x 158mm
- ISBN: 9781399617949
Press Reviews
- Robert Moor, New York Times bestselling author of In Trees and On Trails
Elegant and electrifying, this sweeping tale of would-be shamans, corporate cowboys, and faithful acolytes of the God Molecule is one of the sharpest works of long-form journalism I've read in years. It somehow manages to unveil new worlds, expose frauds, and tell a throat-gripping good yarn all at once. Don't hesitate-take the trip!
- Susan Orlean, author of The Orchid Thief
Told with verve and built on deep reporting, The Ego Trip is strange and wonderful. De Greef is a great storyteller and he guides the reader beautifully around this story's crazy curves
- William Finnegan, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Barbarian Days
A one-of-a-kind book. I loved it. A gripping, meticulous journey through the rise and commercialisation of a ferocious new psychedelic. Kimon de Greef is indefatigable. At his story's heart is a charismatic doctor from Guadalajara, who becomes an addled villain on the order of Raskolnikov or Walter White - a character for the ages
- Patrick Radden Keefe, author of Empire of Pain
Entirely mesmerizing, a tale of psychedelic tourists, shamanistic grift, chemistry, chicanery, tribal history, a chemical gold rush in the Sonoran desert and, above all, the enduring human quest for transcendence. Richly reported and written with humour and flair, The Ego Trip is itself a trip and Kimon de Greef is a major talent
- Publisher's Weekly
Propulsive and rigorously reported, this wild work of true crime grips from first page to last
- Library Journal
A gripping exploration . . . de Greef offers an intricate, layered narrative that asks why people seek out these forms of therapy and what impact they have. De Greef's unsettling true-crime account challenges readers to consider how easily hope, belief, and authority can become entangled, leaving lasting impacts on both individuals and communities
- Kirkus
De Greef's book is quite a trip - and one well worth taking
Oliver Bullough
GuardianAn unusually clear-eyed view . . . As methodical, exacting, well-written and exceptionally reported as you'd expect . . . Highly enjoyable . . . Everything from the undeserved authority of charlatans, to the rampant exploitation of the natural world, to the hiding of hyper-capitalism behind a shield of cod-mystical woo-woo: it's all in there
- Wall Street Journal
Those seeking a less arduous route to illumination may find guidance in The Ego Trip, an engaging study of toad smoking and its psychedelic effects
Susannah Cahalan
New York TimesAn enthralling, galling journey into the deeply weird underbelly of the psychedelic renaissance